I can't be here.
School has taken its gradual toll on my free time, and a gradual feeling of nervousness has sort of followed this quarter. It's flying by, and all the work is just not getting done. It scares me. My parents routinely get angry at me, with the sort of exapseration that suggests that something's going to happen, and soon. They'd probably send me to some other school, yet another nail in the coffin of my supposed self-sufficiency. I failed math and health last quarter: if either of those happen again this quarter, I am simply dead. They'll cart me off with no question, taking me out of someplace I actually liked and transferring me to someplace which will only exasperate me.
Special education has been around me forever, often in far more of a role than I like. To actually get rid of this, I have to leave here, concentrate on my studies. It'll help me actually appreciate myself.
Don't think it's just you: I plan on going through my hard drive when I get home, transferring stuff to other places. It's necessary.
Other stuff exists, too. Being here whatsoever has botched my sleeping schedule , often leaving me up in the wee hours of the morning, subject to even more exasperation. This I can fix. There are so many things that I'm dissatisfied with about my life, and just being an escapist isn't going to help with any of them.
I love this place: it's one of the few places I actually enjoy on the Internet. But damnit, I'm just going to have to give it up for the time being.
